A forever family Fostering change one child at a time

Rob Scheer

Book - 2018

"In the tradition of The Promise of a Pencil and Kisses from Katie comes an inspirational memoir by the founder of Comfort Cases about his turbulent childhood in the foster care system and the countless obstacles and discrimination he endured in adopting his four children"--

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Subjects
Genres
Autobiographies
Published
New York, NY : Gallery Books 2018.
Language
English
Main Author
Rob Scheer (author)
Other Authors
Jon Sternfeld (author)
Edition
First Gallery Books hardcover edition
Physical Description
viii, 306 pages : illustrations ; 24 cm
Bibliography
Includes bibliographical references.
ISBN
9781501196638
  • Introduction
  • 1. What We Don't Talk About
  • 2. What I Remember
  • 3. Coming Back
  • 4. One with Another
  • 5. A New Kind of Empty
  • 6. Where to Go
  • 7. A Mother
  • 8. The Saddest Girl in the World
  • 9. Reunion
  • 10. Boys
  • 11. Out
  • 12. Union
  • 13. Rodger's Gift
  • 14. Trials
  • 15. Reece
  • 16. Bonding Studies
  • 17. The Power of Names
  • 18. He's My Son
  • 19. Just Children
  • 20. A Thousand Words
  • 21. The Future We All Have
  • Acknowledgments
  • Appendix: Ways to Get Involved
  • Notes
Review by Booklist Review

This reflective memoir about a childhood filled with abuse and neglect slowly evolves into a call for reevaluating America's foster care system. Scheer's biological family was a tangled web of step-siblings and adults who, at best, kept him alive until he was 12. His foster family was a slight improvement, but that ended with his eighteenth birthday. It wasn't until his late thirties, when Rob met Reece and began his first healthy relationship, that those ruptured life patterns changed. When they were ready to start a family, Rob and Reece discovered that they would have a better chance as foster parents than trying for adoption. Taking in two separate sets of siblings taught the couple about how the system worked and didn't work and launched them on a mission of positive change, including founding the charity organization, Comfort Cases. The personal journeys of Rob, Reece, and their four children are emotionally engaging, and their first-hand perspective on foster care and adoption, with the added dimension of them being a same-sex couple, may spark serious discussion of a complex, challenging topic.--Stacey Hayman Copyright 2018 Booklist

From Booklist, Copyright (c) American Library Association. Used with permission.
Review by Publisher's Weekly Review

Scheer, founder of Comfort Cases, a charity that provides backpacks for foster children (stocked with sleepwear, books, toiletries, etc.), shares the gripping story of his own troubled childhood and his experience adopting four foster children as an adult. As a boy growing up in 1970s Virginia, Scheer was physically abused by his father while his mother turned a blind eye. She eventually fled with her son and two older daughters only to settle with a boyfriend who was also abusive; within a few years she died of cancer, and the 12-year-old Scheer was sent to live with his biological father, who eventually abandoned him (his sisters were old enough to live on their own). A neighbor agreed to foster him, but her husband mistreated Scheer, and at 18 he left, sleeping in his car and public restrooms during his senior year of high school. After years of failed relationships as an adult, Scheer met and fell in love with a kind and caring man named Reece and they moved in together, eventually marrying. The memoir toggles between Scheer's early life and the couple's more recent struggle to adopt two sets of African-American siblings who arrived with their few possessions in trash bags (which later prompted Scheer to launch the Comfort Case nonprofit). Scheer's determination to "be the father that I never had" while helping kids in the flawed foster care system, will inspire, educate, and astound readers. Agent: Cait Hoyt and David Larabell, CAA. (Nov.) c Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved.

(c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved
Review by Kirkus Book Review

A former foster child pays its forward by cultivating his own unconventional family.In an effort to "never let a horrific childhood become a tragic adulthood," foster care advocate and entrepreneur Scheer dedicated his life to ensuring foster children in the Washington, D.C., metropolitan area never suffer the insecurity and instability he endured for years. The author describes a horrific childhood full of extreme physical abuse at the hands of an alcoholic father and a mother who'd married seven times and birthed 10 children, dragging her children with her through each bad relationship. The result was emotional scarring lasting well into his 30s, when Scheer met his future partner, Reece, a pragmatic man who would come to be known as "the voice of reason in our home." Always wanting a family of his own, the author describes the couple's grueling fostering process, riddled by delays and bureaucraticand homophobicred tape. Eventually, they adopted sister and brother Amaya and Makai, and soon after, two more boys, to become a blended family. Interpersonal bonding and finalizing the process in court proved challenging but also a unique opportunity for Scheer and Reece to realize their shared dream of fatherhood. In an unsparingly honest and warmhearted book, the author moves the narrative along with vivid details that are alternately joyful and sorrowful to read. Braided into his journey is a detailed account of his odyssey shuffling through a succession of barbaric foster homes, his emergence as a gay man, and his struggles through a series of toxic relationships. Though Scheer admits to still being haunted by the pain of his past, his loving devotion to his family is evident on every page of this stirring narrative. Furthering his initiative is his project Comfort Cases, which supplies backpacks filled with essential items to foster children in need and a yearly college scholarship fund for kids aging out of foster care into higher educational opportunities.A heartwarming, hopeful memoir brimming with humanitarianism and compassion. Copyright Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.

Copyright (c) Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.