Review by Booklist Review
Fischer's debut is a compelling and quietly disturbing coming-of-age novel starring sincere yet ambivalent Natalie, a college freshman who leaves her Canadian small town for university in Toronto. There, she tries on various personas but finds it impossible to overcome her anxiety of being thought naive. She meets thirtysomething Nora in the park and is smitten. Nora's attention makes the air seem "newly full." Their relationship gives Natalie a new sense of value--why else would someone like Nora be interested in her? She keeps their relationship secret, only going so far as telling her friend Clara that she has an older boyfriend. Meanwhile, Natalie's experience in poetry class, where she wishes to impress the professor and compares herself to another student, highlights her continued self-doubt, exacerbated by Nora's reluctance to declare her love as Natalie has. It's a power dynamic that's doomed to fail, becoming more complicated as Nora's motivations come into question. Fischer expertly captures the intensity of a first relationship and the constant self-questioning of an insecure young woman.
From Booklist, Copyright (c) American Library Association. Used with permission.
Review by Publisher's Weekly Review
In Fischer's engrossing debut, a freshman at the University of Toronto struggles with anxiety and homesickness. Natalie, having given up her rural life on Lake Temagami to study in the city, is having a hard time adjusting to the change. Then one day she's approached in the park by a charming, divorced woman named Nora. They soon become lovers, and the playful and attentive Nora makes Natalie feel like the center of attention. Indeed, about Nora, Natalie thinks, "I wanted her to tell me how I should spend all my time." She keeps their relationship secret, telling her friends she's seeing an older man. Meanwhile, Natalie is captivated by a poetry class taught by a formidable professor rumored to have slept with a student. Natalie feels inadequate at every turn, comparing her poetry to her sophisticated classmates' and fretting over how directionless she feels. Then, over winter break, she learns Nora has been hiding something that threatens their bliss. Fischer paints Natalie with care, exploring the depths of her spinning, developing mind. Full of heart, this perfectly captures the lonely messiness of youth. Agent: Sam Hiyate, Rights Factory. (May)
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Review by Kirkus Book Review
New college student Natalie falls in love with Nora, a woman nearly twice her age, in Fischer's debut novel. With college looming, Natalie stews about moving to Toronto, and Fischer captures teenage uncertainty brilliantly: "I wondered if I should buy a more specific jacket. One that could quickly show the core elements of my character." As well as a new city, Natalie is navigating her hitherto unexplored sexuality. When she meets Nora, a grant writer in her 30s who quickly captivates her, she's prompted to reappraise her self-image: "Who was I, if she was curious about me? Not the person I'd expected myself to be." Their physical relationship is revelatory for Natalie: "Didn't I like being dipped into, the breaking surface of myself that still rippled from the afterthought of her touch?" Alongside Natalie's romantic relationship run a platonic one she has with her dorm-mate Clara and one she witnesses unfold between her poetry professor and an obsessive classmate. She struggles to reconcile her seemingly disparate selves--embarrassed when she finds out that Nora has seen her playing a game of Assassin with her college friends, not knowing how to tell Clara she's a lesbian, mortified by the dichotomy between her thoughts and the poetry she produces ("Such a slim margin between saying something meaningful and exposing the fallibility of your mind")--Natalie becomes increasingly fraught with self-doubt. What runs consistently through the novel is the unease of the age and power disparities between Natalie and Nora. While the denouement is in no way shocking, it's satisfyingly dramatic, and Fischer encourages the reader to remember their own first heartbreak. As Natalie looks back on the relationship, she sees her own innocence clearly: "I had been much younger then, hadn't I?" This insightful novel is alive with vibrant prose, emotional acuity, and complex female characters. A meditation on what it means to step into your authentic self--with all the subsequent confusion and pain laid bare. Copyright (c) Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.
Copyright (c) Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.
