Review by Booklist Review
Weber's debut uses her work as a psychoanalyst to unpack 12 different yet universal desires. Sandwiched by generalized observations of how each desire can hinder and inform our lives are Weber's clients' (their identities disguised) in-depth, detailed stories. This addition to an expanding genre--books that offer a safe window into the therapy of others--fascinates. Some of the stories are brutal and traumatic, and all of the stories are meaningful. Willing to join her clients in self-reflection, Weber discloses her own failings, triggers, and need for mentorship. Weber's work is also playful, with language that includes some inventions of her own and a helpful glossary in the back. Of particular power is Astrid's story in the chapter "On Connection," which begins with the author admitting her incorrect assumptions and ends with her confessing her suspicions about Astrid's happy ending, all to illustrate the importance of finding a therapist you connect with. Weber's clear and engaging writing provides a pathway through complex concepts. Readers who enjoy pondering emotional intelligence and learning through storytelling will appreciate this book.
From Booklist, Copyright (c) American Library Association. Used with permission.
Review by Library Journal Review
Psychotherapist and debut author Weber takes readers inside some intimate conversations between a therapist and her clients about the universal desires that drive people, such as to love and be loved. The book also delves into what people do to get their desires. Each chapter explains one desire and the common issues people face by effectively utilizing a client's story as an example. The author then analyzes the situation through a therapist's lens. The chapter featuring the story of Tessa's end-of-life struggle with how she handled love is very moving and relatable. It also teaches a good lesson about giving of oneself. The book includes a table of contents, glossary, and a section with references for further reading. Weber's personal and intimate tone makes for a relaxing read that provokes introspection. VERDICT This book is recommended for those interested in self-help, therapy, and exploring one's deepest desires.--Bridgette Whitt
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Review by Kirkus Book Review
How to connect with your own needs. Psychotherapist Weber makes her book debut with a thoughtful look at the potential of therapy "to uncover the hidden longings, the cloak-and-dagger feelings, the stories of desire we imagine for our unlived lives." Through examples distilled from her work with a variety of patients, she hopes readers will be able to recognize what they really want from their "one precious life" as well as the obstacles that prevent them from fulfilling those desires. The author frames each chapter, anchored by a case history, with her insights about 12 common longings, including for love, power, control, attention, freedom, and understanding. Besides offering intimate details of a patient's struggles, Weber also reveals the frustrations and doubts that arise in caring for them. "I am a demanding therapist," she admits. "I want therapy to spark something and change life in some way." But some patients make her task difficult. One woman, for example, was "entrapped by repetition compulsions" that took the form of "drinking rituals," bingeing and purging, and "circular fights with her ex-husband, and her parents, and her siblings." Her psychotherapy sessions, too, were "full of repetition and circularity." Several case histories, in fact, reveal frustrating repetitiveness as patients rehash their troubles. Some patients refuse to acknowledge their real needs; others try to distract the therapist from asking uncomfortable questions. Weber is gently persistent: "Therapists are like truffle pigs when it comes to vulnerability: we go hunting and rooting around until we find what we're looking for." The author highlights useful terms--some she's coined herself, all defined in a glossary--to describe behaviors such as sufferiority, meaning "a sense of pride and exceptionalism that is mixed with feelings of shame and inadequacy"; askhole, someone asking for advice and then ignoring it; and femasculating, referring to the disempowerment of women. A perceptive guide to self-knowledge. Copyright (c) Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.
Copyright (c) Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.
