Sounds fake but okay An asexual and aromantic perspective on love, relationships, sex, and pretty much anything else

Sarah Costello

Book - 2023

"Sarah and Kayla invite you to put on your purple aspec glasses - and rethink everything you thought you knew about society, friendship, sex, romance and more. Drawing on their personal stories, and those of aspec friends all over the world, prepare to explore your microlabels, investigate different models of partnership, delve into the intersection of gender norms and compulsory sexuality and reconsider the meaning of sex - when allosexual attraction is out of the equation. Spanning the whole range of relationships we have in our lives - to family, friends, lovers, society, our gender, and ourselves, this book asks you to let your imagination roam, and think again what human connection really is. Includes exclusive 'Sounds Fake B...ut Okay' podcast episodes."--

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Subjects
Published
London ; Philadelphia : Jessica Kingsley Publishers 2023.
Language
English
Main Author
Sarah Costello (author)
Other Authors
Kayla Kaszyca (author)
Physical Description
160 pages ; 22 cm
Bibliography
Includes bibliographical references (pages 150-152) and index.
ISBN
9781839970016
  • Dictionary
  • Prologue
  • Ch 1. Society
  • Ch 2. Yourself
  • Ch 3. Friendship
  • Ch 4. Romance and Partnerships
  • Ch 5. Sex
  • Ch 6. Family
  • Ch 7. Gender
  • Ch 8. Miscellanea
  • References
  • Acknowledgments
  • Index
Review by Publisher's Weekly Review

Kaszyca and Costello, creators of the Sounds Fake but Okay podcast, shift to the page for this insightful take on asexuality, aromanticism, and other sexual identities. Kaszyca, who identities as demisexual, and Costello, who identifies as aromantic-asexual, consider what it means to be asexual (feeling "little to no sexual attraction," though they note "this is not the same as sexual desire or a person's libido") and aromantic (feeling "little to no romantic attraction"), their experiences coming out as such, and the dangers of a society that normalizes rigid expectations of sex and romance. They also examine the ways being on the "aspectrum," which combines aromantic and asexual spectrums, filters into other areas of life--dealing with parents, for example, who realize "maybe they wouldn't someday be walking down the aisle like they expected." The authors highlight the importance of platonic love, which is often viewed within Western society as "lesser," and explain various nontraditional relationships, such as queerplatonic and polyamorous ones. Bringing important lived experiences to the discussion, Costello and Kaszyca prove to be skillful guide for those curious about the breadth and variety of sexual identities. Those on the aspectrum and allies alike will find plenty that enlightens. (Feb.)

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