Getting along How to work with anyone (even difficult people)

Amy Gallo

Book - 2022

"When we're dealing with difficult people, our creativity, productivity, and engagement suffer. Conflict and stress compromise our ability to think clearly and make sound decisions. We get caught up in our heads, lie awake at night worrying, withdraw from work, or react in ways we later regret-rolling our eyes in a meeting, snapping at colleagues, or staying silent when we should speak up. Our negative relationships are contagious, infecting our teams and organizations as well. Too often we grin and bear it as if we have no choice. Or throw up our hands because one-size-fits-all solutions haven't worked. But you can only endure so much thoughtless, irrational, or malicious behavior-there's your sanity to consider, and yo...ur career. In Getting Along: How to Work with Anyone (Even Difficult People), workplace expert and Harvard Business Review podcast host Amy Gallo identifies eight familiar types of difficult coworkers-the insecure boss, the passive-aggressive peer, the know-it-all, the biased coworker, and others-and provides strategies tailored to dealing constructively with each one. Facing a special case who defies categorization? She shares principles that will help you turn things around no matter who you're at odds with. Taking the high road isn't easy, but Gallo offers the compassion, encouragement, and tools you need to prevail-on your terms. She answers questions, such as: How much do work relationships matter?; Why can't I stop thinking about that nasty email?!; What's behind my problem colleague's behavior? ; How can I fix things if they won't cooperate?; I've tried everything-what now? Full of relatable, cringe-worthy examples, the latest behavioral science research, and practical advice you can use right now, Getting Along is an indispensable guide to navigating your toughest relationships at work-and building interpersonal resilience in the process"--

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Subjects
Published
Boston, Massachusetts : Harvard Business Review Press [2022]
Language
English
Main Author
Amy Gallo (author)
Item Description
Includes index.
Physical Description
viii, 284 pages ; 24 cm
ISBN
9781647821067
  • Introduction
  • Can't We All Just Get Along?
  • Part 1. Laying the Groundwork for Getting Along
  • 1. Why Work Relationships Are Worth the Trouble
  • Good or bad, they matter.
  • 2. Your Brain on Conflict
  • How our minds often work against us.
  • Part 2. The Archetypes
  • 3. The Insecure Boss
  • "I'm great at my job ... right?"
  • 4. The Pessimist
  • "This will never work."
  • 5. The Victim
  • "Why does this always happen to me?"
  • 6. The Passive-Aggressive Peer
  • "Fine. Whatever."
  • 7. The Know-It-All
  • "Well, actually ..."
  • 8. The Tormentor
  • "I suffered and you should too."
  • 9. The Biased Coworker
  • "Why are you so sensitive?"
  • 10. The Political Operator
  • "If you aren't moving up, you're falling behind."
  • 11. Nine Principles for Getting Along with Anyone
  • Change is possible.
  • Part 3. Protecting Yourself
  • 12. When All Else Fails
  • Don't give up-yet.
  • 13. Approaches That Rarely Work
  • They'll only make things worse.
  • 14. Taking Care
  • Your well-being is priority number one.
  • Appendix: Who Am I Dealing With?
  • Figuring out which archetype(s) your coworker fits into.
  • Notes
  • Index
  • Acknowledgments
  • About the Author
Review by Publisher's Weekly Review

"Too often, we just put up with difficult people," admonishes Gallo (The HBR Guide to Dealing with Conflict), a contributing editor at Harvard Business Review, in this empowering guide to handling interpersonal conflict at work. Gallo cites data showing that people are spending more and more time at work, and suggests workers ought to be putting effort into their relationships there. To help readers do so, she organizes her guidance around eight workplace archetypes--the insecure boss, the passive-aggressive peer, the political operator, the know-it-all, etc.--and offers advice for working with each of them, along with self-reflection questions and scripts. When dealing with "the pessimist," for example, one can try saying "I wonder what another way of seeing this might be," and for the "insecure boss," starting sentences with "we" is a good call. For "the political operator" who sees everyone as competition, meanwhile, one can try to offer help or ask for advice: both disarm them. Her guiding principle--in times of conflict it's best to focus on being "the adult in the room"--is well conveyed, and the strategies she shares land as realistic. This practical and empathetic guide to taking the high road is worth a look for workers lost in conflict. (Sept.)

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