Enough already Learning to love the way I am today

In a series of brutally frank essays, Bertinelli (Losing It), host of the Food Network show Valerie's Home Cooking, looks back on the emotional struggles and triumphs of her life. Sharing her "efforts to, at sixty-one years old, set aside the land mines of denial, negativity, and self-hate" that she cultivated during her decades-long acting career, she contends with her weight gain after losing 50 pounds and posing on the cover of People Magazine in a bikini ("I was happy that day although I almost fainted on the set"); conveys her deep grief around the death of her ex-husband Eddie Van Halen, who died from cancer in October 2020; and revels in her joy at winning two Emmy Awards for her TV show. She doesn't mince words when speaking of her body image issues, the challenges she faced as an actor ("the process made me anxious"), or how she overcame her shortcomings and learned to accept her appearance ("whether I was a size two, an eight, or a twelve, I was still me"). As Bertinelli works through her pain, she offers rewards in the form of sumptuous recipes--including, notably, her spinach-crab dip, her mother's unbeatable lasagna, and Sicilian Chocolate Love Cake. By turns raw and inspiring, this contains a little bit of wisdom for everyone. (Jan.)

The actor and Food Network host dishes up delightful recipes as she reflects on how she learned to see beyond a troubled self-image and embrace joy. Bertinelli (b. 1960) seemed to live a charmed life throughout her adolescence and early adulthood. Catapulted to fame as a teenager in the 1970s sitcom One Day at a Time, she went on to win two Golden Globe Awards and marry her rocker "soulmate," Eddie Van Halen. But her early TV successes did not bring about the movie career she desired, and her husband became a substance abuser whose volatility led a reluctant Bertinelli to file for divorce. These "currents of unhappiness, sadness, and discontent" caused her to struggle with her weight and, later, to take on work as a spokesperson for Jenny Craig. This decision, which Bertinelli thought would fix her problems, instead put her in an "all-or-nothing situation where the stakes were not only disappointment but also public shame and humiliation if I didn't reach my goal, to say nothing of the devastation that this would cause privately." Reflecting on her choices, the author realized that her poor body image was the result of growing up with parents who did not express personal pain and a mother who "ended up on a lifelong diet because she ate her feelings instead of working to understand them." Ultimately, however, food allowed Bertinelli to redefine her life. A trip to Italy led to the publication of a cookbook, two popular cooking shows, and release from the self-isolating "dieting mindset" that had imprisoned her. The author now understands food as the thing that brings friends and family together even during dark times--e.g., the pandemic lockdowns or the final months of her beloved ex-husband's battle with cancer. Interspersed throughout with the author's favorite recipes, this thoughtful, bighearted book is sure to be a hit with Bertinelli fans and those with an appetite for stories of hard-won self-acceptance. A warmly intimate memoir. Copyright (c) Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.