Broke millennial talks money Scripts, stories, and advice to navigate awkward financial conversations

Erin Lowry

Book - 2020

"A comprehensive guide to talking about money in every aspect of your life, including at work, with friends and family, and in relationships, from the author of the Broke Millennial series."--

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Self-help publications
New York : TarcherPerigee, Penguin Random House [2020]
Main Author
Erin Lowry (author)
Physical Description
xvii, 280 pages ; 21 cm
Includes bibliographical references (pages 279-280).
  • Introduction
  • Part 1. Talking About Money at Work
  • Chapter 1. "How Much Do You Make?"
  • Chapter 2. Asking for More Money (a.k.a. Time to Negotiate)
  • Part 2. Talking About Money with Friends
  • Chapter 3. Should You Share Your Numbers with Friends?
  • Chapter 4. What Happens When You're in Significantly Different Financial Situations?
  • Chapter 5. Setting Boundaries
  • Chapter 6. Let's Talk About Weddings
  • Part 3. Talking About Money with Family
  • Chapter 7. How to Ask Your Parents If You'll Need to Take Care of Them Financially
  • Chapter 8. When a Loved One Requires Your Help (or Intervention)
  • Chapter 9. Why We Normally Avoid Talking Money at the Dinner Table
  • Part 4. Talking About Money with Your Romantic Partner
  • Chapter 10. From Casual to Pretty Serious
  • Chapter 11. It Just Got Really Serious: Money and Marriage
  • Chapter 12. Fighting Fair About Money
  • Chapter 13. It's All Changing:
  • Navigating the Finances of a Major Life Change
  • Epilogue
  • Acknowledgments
  • Appendix: Every Single Money Script
  • Notes

Introduction On a surprisingly warm New York City winter night in 2020, Peach and I were exiting a recording studio when he said, "I think it's important to make sure people know we don't always reach a clean, easy solu­tion to our money disagreements." The two of us had just completed a rare media interview together. Over the course of my then- seven years being "Broke Millennial," Peach-- my pseudonym for my husband-- had been a character in my work. He had the authority to decide if and how he wanted his image and information shared, but he usually wasn't the one being interviewed. We'd been asked to do an interview for a podcast about the experi­ence of getting a prenuptial agreement-- a highly taboo subject that al­most always elicits an immediate reaction from people. (You probably just had one yourself.) Before the interview, we'd had several conversations about our own boundaries and what we were and weren't comfortable letting the world know. I share a lot with you in my books and on social media, but, per­haps surprisingly, there are morsels I keep for myself. Because we'd gone into the interview knowing where we drew the line-- and we were more than a year removed from our prenup process-- it had started to come off like we'd just flawlessly navigated the experi­ence with nary a speed bump. That was, of course, not the case. We had disagreements that sometimes escalated to fights with hurt feelings. We learned things about each other and our relationships to money, possessions, and perceived ownership and entitlement. We still have one reoccurring debate that has yet to be settled. (Don't worry, we're going to talk a lot more about prenups in part 4!) Even though Peach and I don't always see eye to eye on finances, we do one thing a lot: talk. Talking about money is critical. Why I Wanted To Write This Book A few years ago, I noticed a trend in what people were asking me to speak about at events and in the media. They really wanted to learn how to talk about money. Okay, no one phrased it that way. They'd ask specific ques­tions about awkward interactions that were seemingly only made un­comfortable because of money. For example, getting a Venmo request from a friend asking you to split the cost of the wine she purchased for the movie night she invited you to. Or how to travel with friends when everyone is on a different budget. Or whether you should help pay off your boyfriend's student loans. Or whether you really need to [ you can fill in the blank with anything about wedding season here ]. This got me thinking about the fact that there really wasn't a definitive guide out there on how to navigate these conversations. There was a smat­tering of information here and there in other books, but none of them of­fered scripts and stories and advice on how to actually talk about money. It took a long time to figure out how to explain this book to people (honestly, I'm still trying to be more succinct). When you say, "It's a book about relationships and money," people immediately translate that to ro­mantic relationships. So I pivoted to saying, "It's a book about how to talk about money with all the important people in your life." The response? Blank stares. Then I tried: "It's a book that helps you talk about money at work, with family, with friends, and with your romantic partner." "Oh, I need that book!" was the general response. Excerpted from Broke Millennial Talks Money: Scripts, Stories, and Advice to Navigate Awkward Financial Conversations by Erin Lowry All rights reserved by the original copyright owners. Excerpts are provided for display purposes only and may not be reproduced, reprinted or distributed without the written permission of the publisher.