Rules for visiting A novel

Jessica Francis Kane, 1971-

Book - 2019

A beautifully observed and deeply funny novel of May Attaway, a university gardener who sets out on an odyssey to reconnect with four old friends over the course of a year. At forty, May Attaway is more at home with plants than people. Over the years, she's turned inward, finding pleasure in language, her work as a gardener, and keeping her neighbors at arm's length while keenly observing them. But when she is unexpectedly granted some leave from her job, May is inspired to reconnect with four once close friends. She knows they will never have a proper reunion, so she goes, one-by-one, to each of them. A student of the classics, May considers her journey a female Odyssey. What might the world have had if, instead of waiting, Penel...ope had set out on an adventure of her own? RULES FOR VISITING is a woman's exploration of friendship in the digital age. Deeply alert to the nobility and the ridiculousness of ordinary people, May savors the pleasures along the way--afternoon ice cream with a long-lost friend, surprise postcards from an unexpected crush, and a moving encounter with ancient beauty. Though she gets a taste of viral online fame, May chooses to bypass her friends' perfectly cultivated online lives to instead meet them in their messy analog ones. Ultimately, May learns that a best friend is someone who knows your story--and she inspires us all to master the art of visiting.

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Subjects
Published
New York : Penguin Press [2019]
Language
English
Main Author
Jessica Francis Kane, 1971- (author)
Physical Description
pages ; cm
ISBN
9780525559221
Contents unavailable.
Review by New York Times Review

"It seems to me that your oldest friends can offer a glimpse of who you were from a time before you had a sense of yourself and that's what I'm after." So declares May Attaway, a diffident professional gardener who undertakes four road trips to see fallen-away girlfriends in hopes of discovering not who she was but how she's become who she is. May's droll commentary sometimes crackles with wit ("One woman with well-cut hair, stylish glasses and trendy jeans stood with us for longer than I expected. I was sure she had a sofa at home she was very proud of"), though most of it is composed of literary factoids: The term "living room" originated in Ladies' Home Journal; Emerson felt Thoreau was a bad houseguest. Who knew? Who cares? Kane's novel is landfilled with such highbrow trivia as May's life of quiet desperation plods on, page after page, the road trip you wish would just end. Reclusive and standoffish, May is a woman whose connections with plants have prevented her from making connections with people. So when we're supposed to revel in her discovery of an ancient yew tree in Scotland, which she experiences in almost spiritual terms, her joy feels as unknowable as she is. Once back home, she throws a big party, which is evidently meant to demonstrate that she's been pulled out of her shell: She's now serving cake to neighborhood kids and considering dating the restaurateur who sends her moony postcards. There's just one problem: She still seems like the dour misanthrope who first packed her bags. May comes off as an affable houseguest, but her wan geniality mainly results from lack of effort - she can't be bothered to get angry when her luggage is lost or when a developer threatens to destroy an idyllic dell. It's difficult to construct a compelling narrative around a heroine whose motto appears to be "Whatever."

Copyright (c) The New York Times Company [August 23, 2019]
Review by Booklist Review

In the age of Facebook, the true nature of friendship can seem muddled. At any rate, May Attaway, 40, single, and living in her childhood home with her aging father, has preferred the company of the trees and flowers; hence her career as a botanist and landscape architect. She can name three childhood pals and a woman from grad school, but she's a lousy friend: no texts, no breezy Facebook status updates, barely a holiday greeting. Still, Lindy, Vanessa, Neera, and Rose have been important to May, so she sets out on a journey to reconnect with them and find out if there is a reciprocal kernel of friendship that this gardener can nourish back into a blossoming relationship. They are far-flung, but May visits each one, hoping that they can assuage the loneliness and feeling of being unmoored that is increasingly permeating her life. Kane's (This Close, 2013) preternaturally self-aware heroine is an intriguing mix of frustrating curmudgeon and aging ingenue, and in her quest for self-improvement, she voices the doubts and dreams of any woman who has questioned what it means to be a true friend. Rich in subtexts and lush imagery, Kane's novel is a sure bet for lively book discussions.--Carol Haggas Copyright 2019 Booklist

From Booklist, Copyright (c) American Library Association. Used with permission.
Review by Publisher's Weekly Review

In Kane's impeccably written and surprisingly moving second novel (after The Report), May Attaway is an endearingly principled university gardener approaching 40, who lives in her childhood home in Anneville with her father, a retired professor. She moved back to take care of her mother, who has since died, and has neither married nor had children. Though not unhappy, May's life is at an impasse. When a poem about a yew tree on campus wins a major prize, and a reporter points out May planted the original cutting, she is rewarded with 30 days of paid leave. This coincides with the death of a writer May never knew personally, but whose tribute site May is fond of reading after it went up following her death. So May, seeing how beloved the writer is, decides to use her month off to visit four old friends: Lindy, a happy mom of three and homemaker; Neera, living on the West Coast and navigating a disintegrating marriage; Vanessa, living a cosmopolitan life in New York; and Rose, also a gardener and living in her native England. On May's visits, she comes to realize the importance of empathy in cultivating relationships, not only with them but with the many people in her life, both past and present. May's journey is lovely and deeply affecting. (May) © Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved.

(c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved
Review by Library Journal Review

In Kane's fourth novel (after The Report), 40-year-old university gardener May lives in the town where she grew up. She's more comfortable cultivating plants than relationships. May is a keen observer of people but engages only minimally with them. When she unexpectedly gets awarded extra leave at her job, she decides to travel to visit four friends who have significantly impacted her life at various stages. But her friends have moved away and are busy. May's hope is to reconnect with them and see what their lives are like besides what they present on social media. There, and back again, May might realize that her outward quest has been an inner journey all along. VERDICT Kane's delightful tale celebrates friendship, family, love, joy in the ordinary, finding peace, and connecting with those around us. Highly recommended for fans of humorous, touching stories about friendship and self-discovery. [See Prepub Alert, 11/26/18.]-Susan Moritz, Silver Spring, MD © Copyright 2019. Library Journals LLC, a wholly owned subsidiary of Media Source, Inc. No redistribution permitted.

(c) Copyright Library Journals LLC, a wholly owned subsidiary of Media Source, Inc. No redistribution permitted.
Review by Kirkus Book Review

In Kane's (This Close, 2013, etc.) contemplative second novel, a woman uses an unexpected gift of time to visit four long-neglected friends.Despite the wire hanger of a plot surrounding these visits, the novel turns on narrator May's ruminations. Her love of cats and trees (beautiful arboreal drawings by Edward Carey punctuate the text), not to mention her suitcase named Grendel, suggests a delicate, even twee sensibility, but May is capable of expressing curmudgeonly tart opinions about everything from home renovation to the value of neighbors to social media's evils. Approaching 40, she lives quietly with her aged father in her hometown, working as a gardener at the local university and pondering how best to use 30 days of paid leave the school has awarded her. Inspired by readings on friendship, a skill she'd like to improve, and using The Odyssey as a reverse model of epic adventuring"What if Penelope had left?" she asks herselfMay sets off to visit her long-distance friends. All are surprised by May's visits but pleased to see her. In return, May follows Emily Post and Greek travel etiquette to become a perfect guest, although she tends to hover at the brink of actual intimacy. Her cautious affection blends with sly humor in her observations of each hostess: the suburban homemaker cracking under the pressure of creating internet-worthy domestic perfection; the Seattle ultraprogressive in the middle of a divorce; the Manhattan sophisticate stressed by her new roles as second wife and stepmother; and the landscape architect leading an invitingly cozy single life in London. May is generous in sharing her thoughts, but the reader must search between the lines to read her heart as May begins receiving postcards hinting at a desire for more than friendship from a nice man back home. More apparent is May's emotional struggle with unresolved grief over her mother's lingering illness and death years earlier.Engagingly cleareyed prose about a winningly eccentric heroine in love with trees and literature. Copyright Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.

Copyright (c) Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.