Never stop walking A memoir of finding home across the world

In this intimate memoir, activist Rickardsson examines her childhood in the slums of São Paulo, Brazil, and her later adoption by Swedish parents. Rickardsson spent her first eight years in destitution, sleeping in the caves and hollows of a Brazilian mountainside with her single mother. When the two needed money, they would go into the densely populated downtown, mother working night and day, daughter playing, fighting, and sleeping in the filthy, dangerous streets. When a promising job required Christina's mother to move away, she left Christina and her infant brother at an orphanage, thinking it was a school. Christina and her brother were permanently separated from their mamãe, who had been secretly battling schizophrenia for many years. The children were adopted by a wealthy couple and moved to Sweden. Twenty-four years after she last saw her biological mother, Christina returned to Brazil for the women to be reunited. A haunting story of balancing identities, Rickardsson's debut is an unforgettable meditation on the weight of early childhood trauma and recovery.--Eathorne, Courtney Copyright 2018 Booklist

A Brazilian-born Swedish woman's account of childhood poverty and reconciling her early trauma with her experiences in adulthood.In 2012, Rickardsson discovered that she had suddenly "hit the wall." Gradually, it became clear that her troubled past had finally caught up with her. Growing up, she and her younger brother, Patrick, had lived a feral existence alongside their schizophrenic single mother, Petronilia, in a series of caves just outside So Paulo. As difficult as their circumstances were, their mother still managed to make their lives bearable through her unstinting love. Eventually, the family made their way to So Paulo's favelas, where Petronilia worked menial jobs and Rickardsson quickly learned that survival meant doing whatever it took to secure a meal. In one disturbing episode, she recounts how she inadvertently killed a young boy who tried to steal her food scraps. But the author never forgot the stolen moments of joy she experienced with other street children. Petronilia eventually left her children in an orphanage that brokered their adoption into a Swedish family. Life in Europe was far easier materially, but emotionally, Rickardsson realized she had been "split in two." On the outside, she was Christina, the brown-skinned girl who strove to fit into a white, upper-middle-class Swedish world. On the inside, she was Christiana, the scrappy street fighter who bore the weight of a painful past. Rickardsson's breakthrough came when she found the name of the orphanage from which she had been adopted. Seeking to bridge the gap between who she was and who she became, the author flew to Brazil to find her mother and come to terms with her past. Both candid and compelling, Rickardsson's story is not only about a woman seeking to heal the fractures inherent in a transnational identity; it is also a moving meditation on poverty, injustice, and the meaning of family.A thought-provoking and humane memoir of survival and self-discovery. Copyright Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.