The Journey If you can see your path laid out in front of you step by step, you know it's not your path. Your own path you make with every step you take. That's why it's your path. Joseph Campbell One Step at a Time Dynamic Running Therapy is not complicated or particularly challenging-it's more about learning a couple of simple but very powerful techniques and embarking on an exploration of who you are. Like most journeys, the important thing is to keep putting one foot in front of the other. Try to practice being mindful of your journey as you continue to move forward-this means being aware of how you experience yourself as you go along. By being aware of your progression on the journey you allow yourself the opportunity to cultivate a more compassionate, gentle and accepting relationship with yourself. Remember, you are not actively changing anything-merely noticing the tone of your inner dialog and meeting whatever you find there with acceptance and patience, letting it pass on by naturally. Often in this busy, overstimulated world of ours, we treat the relationship we have with ourselves as a secondary concern, an afterthought that can be dealt with at some later date. Often we tell ourselves that we will find time to slow down tomorrow, change our diet next week, or work on our self-respect next month. As a result, our relationships suffer as we grow less connected with the world and those around us. When we become aware of who we are we can better reach out to others and enjoy the world more. It sounds simple. It is simple. But it takes a little discipline and a little commitment. In her TED talk, the author Elizabeth Gilbert says of her relationship with her creative inspiration: "I am not the pipeline, I am a mule." She is sharing an understanding that creativity comes from hard work and determination, not by simply making ourselves available. Forming a relationship with yourself is a creative act that requires playfulness, experimentation and, perhaps above all, commitment and hard work. We cannot sit back and expect the world to present itself at our door each morning carrying a divine plan for the day. To embrace life fully and achieve our goals we must take those proactive steps toward them. Sometimes our experiments will fail, but that is all part of the learning process-it is important to fail so that you know you have tried. Sometimes you will hit a dead-end, be it physically, mentally or emotionally, but that's OK; stick with the journey and you will get to where you need to go. It might not end where you thought it would, and it might take longer than you thought it would to get there, but persistence will pay off. If until now you have struggled to face your troubles and insecurities head-on, you are not alone. The very nature of life is that it is a constant stream of change, of victory and loss, of love and betrayal, of birth and death. DRT will help you to engage with and cherish your struggles and triumphs by giving you the space and time to reacquaint yourself with who you truly are. This process does not offer peace and everlasting life-it offers a way to learn to be more accepting of who you are inside and of the things that have already happened to you and will happen to you in the future. It helps you to value what is real in the here and now, not the stories that you tell yourself. It helps you to stop thinking about what has happened in the past or what might happen in the future and instead appreciate what is happening now. Self-acceptance improves with practice-it's something you get good at by doing it over and over again. One client I had lost his business, his wife and his mother in the same year. He experienced this as confirmation that nothing that he touched or loved could last, and he believed that the vulnerability he felt inside as a result was as clear to others as it was to him. In time, through our work together and his commitment, he came to see that constant neglect by this same mother during childhood was the root of his own self-neglect. It was a light-bulb moment that illuminated his own responsibility for self-care. It takes courage to wake up to ourselves. Not being truly at peace with who you are can lead to a lifetime of anxiety; once you stop deceiving yourself, what you find will be refreshing. If your "truth" is fantasy, such avoidance will not lead to safety or happiness. You can tell yourself that you are happy in your current relationship or that your "dream job" you worked for many years to achieve is going well, but if those tales are false you will corrode your sense of well-being from the inside out. The real world in front of you is often actually a much simpler place to inhabit than the one in your jumbled mind. If you are going to embark on the DRT journey then the best advice I can give you is to immerse yourself in the experience as wholeheartedly as you can. Commit yourself to the path ahead. Get moving and keep moving. If at first the steps are small, just keep making them until you're taking long, confident strides forward. Be a kind and gentle mentor to yourself. If you falter, take time to regroup, but keep going. Imagine you are coaching a good friend or a loved one and treat yourself as you would treat them in your situation. The best coaches are patient, understanding, forgiving and inspiring. Be your own champion, give yourself that prematch pep talk and cheer yourself on from the sidelines. A good coach also teaches the importance of discipline and learning. DRT asks you to learn from yourself as you go along-to register and record your journey, including your imperfect moments. Learning how to coach yourself well means catching yourself when you fall. Try to see each moment of self-criticism as a chance to grow. Value these moments for what they are-frequent opportunities to get better at being kind to and accepting of yourself. It's not very complicated and becomes second nature quite quickly if practiced often. Each time you replace self-recrimination with self-acceptance and stay with your practice is a victory. It becomes a celebration of who you are, warts and all. You will also notice how much easier on you it is-it takes much less effort to notice and let go than it does to analyze and chastise. DRT really is about the journey and not the destination, so be patient and keep moving. Each step you take is your step. It belongs to you and no one else. It is your relationship with each moment that fills a lifetime with meaning, not where the path eventually leads. Bear in mind the words of the celebrated Buddhist teacher Pema Chsdrsn, as quoted from the Bodhicitta slogans of Atisha: Don't try to be the fastest. Abandon any hope of fruition. Don't expect applause. Finally, be prepared to struggle a bit. DRT has a way of bringing to the surface really difficult truths about ourselves-the very same truths that can set us free. Along the way fear and shame may emerge. Often they go hand in hand with the most difficult parts of ourselves, the bits we have spent a lifetime trying to disown. Try not to let either get the better of you. This is no easy task. Acknowledge and own them as part of your journey and keep on moving. Fear and shame are a kind of "stuckness"-a getting bogged down in a particular and narrow idea of ourselves. Be mindful, allow them to leave as easily as they arrived. Remember, you are not your thoughts. The Right Footing Setting off on the right footing is important. Try to leave your expectations about both yourself and DRT at home. Try to come to each session with more of an attitude of discovery than planning. This is sometimes called "beginner's mind" because it frees us from the narrow path of historical thinking and opens up new perspectives on our lives. I have an analogy I like about who we think we are versus who we are: I take you into an ice-cream parlor that sells a hundred different varieties and ask you to list the ones you think you will probably like. Chocolate? Cookies and cream? Vanilla almost for sure. Strawberry? You might get to five, ten, even twenty different types. And yet, almost without question, if you tried some of the others you have dismissed you would find among them some very appealing ice cream. The point is we are much more diverse as people than we think we are, but it takes an open attitude to discover the rest of ourselves. If you have some negative ideas about yourself, begin the DRT process looking at yourself with gentle eyes. Some of these ideas will have been put into your head as a child, some through experiences as an adult. But they are seldom as fixed as you think. Be willing to discover, experiment and, most of all, come with an open, beginner's mind. The Process Dynamic Running Therapy involves three simple steps. It begins with grounding-a process of mindfulness based on "checking in" with yourself and your environment. This makes you present and calm, helping prepare you for the second step. This second step is where you will sit/walk/run with whatever question or goal you choose. Finally, we conclude the practice with a moment of reflection on that session in the form of a note-taking exercise, giving you a chance to reflect on what the session has given you. These notes will be important later. Note: You might be surprised what the process churns up but record it truthfully and without editing to see the biggest changes in yourself. Step One: Grounding Begin each session with a four-stage grounding process. Grounding draws on cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) and mindfulness meditation and is a useful way to relax and get in the mood for DRT. In our often busy lives it can take us a long time to center ourselves amid all the noise. That's why these four mindful stages are so important to begin our practice, making you present with what you are feeling and where you are. 1. The Body Scan Find somewhere you feel comfortable-this could be at home, sitting on a park bench or on a beach-and find stillness. (Or if you prefer and are comfortable lying down, find a peaceful bit of grass.) The body scan's role is to locate you in your own body in the here and now. All too many of us are adrift in the past or worrying about the future. This scan, from the crown of the head to the end of your toes, is ideal for raising levels of awareness and setting up the session. Unfold crossed legs and arms (although sitting cross-legged is fine), take a couple of big breaths and relax. Notice how your body feels when you're sitting against the grass or bench. Allow your body to settle more fully into the support of whatever you are sitting on. Notice the points of contact and accompanying sensations. Take a couple more big breaths and again, sensing your body's weight, notice how you move with each breath. Allow yourself to settle fully. Release your shoulders downwards, feeling your head gently rising up. Notice how and where your body moves as you breathe. Remember you are not trying to achieve relaxation or anything else. You are just directing your attention to different parts of your body and being aware of the sensations you find there in as much detail as possible. There is no need to judge them or change them. Just try to stay with the experience as best you can-remember, there is no right way or wrong way to do this. It doesn't matter if the experience is pleasurable or not, or if the sensations are strong or barely discernible, or if we find it hard to stay with the practice or not. All of these are part of the practice but we just notice them. Now, beginning with the top of your head, become aware of your body from top to toe. As you work your way down, try to sense each part individually as you go, noticing whatever sensations you may come across. With a friendly curiosity, become aware of how relaxed that part is, or how warm or cold. What does contact with the firmness beneath you feel like? Can you sense the material of your clothing against your body? Notice your forehead, your nose, your top and bottom lips, your chin, the underside of your chin-every inch of you. In some areas there might be no sensation; that is fine too. If you notice any tension try breathing into it gently, noting what qualities you find there in as much detail as you can. Do the sensations change as you breathe in and out of this place of tension? Continue down the neck to the shoulders, chest, arms, forearms, and to the end of each finger. Don't try to change what you find or make a judgment about it. You are just noticing, that is all. Now to the groin, thighs and finally down the legs. Finish at the end of either the big or small toe. During this process, notice how your thoughts come and go. Acknowledge them and let them drift away ... The goal is to stay in your body, in the moment. Let thoughts come and go and return once more to the practice and your bodily sensations. 2. The Environment Scan Now turn your attention from your body to the environment you are sitting in. Look around, scanning your surroundings slowly, noticing everything your senses pick up. What can you smell? Is it close by? What can you see right in front of you? What is the furthest thing you can see on the horizon? What is the greenest or brightest thing? What are there the most of? What did you fail to see at first? Listen-what can you hear? How many different sounds can you discern? Which are closer and which further away? Which have the highest pitch and which the lowest? Now touch the bench below you or the grass around you. Is it hard? Soft? Warm? Cold? Does it tickle? As with the body scan, the goal is just to be present, just to notice. You don't have to notice everything, or notice it perfectly. Whatever you become aware of, simply acknowledge and then move on. Become one with the moving sounds and sensations of yourself in this place. Excerpted from Running with Mindfulness: Dynamic Running Therapy (DRT) to Improve Low-Mood, Anxiety, Stress, and Depression by William Pullen All rights reserved by the original copyright owners. Excerpts are provided for display purposes only and may not be reproduced, reprinted or distributed without the written permission of the publisher.
