Etched in sand A true story of five siblings who survived an unspeakable childhood on Long Island

Regina Calcaterra

Book - 2013

Calcaterra and her siblings endured a series of foster homes and intermittent homelessness in the shadow of the Hamptons. She managed to rise above her past while fighting to keep her brother and three sisters together. An unforgettable reminder that, regardless of social status, the American dream is still within reach for those who have the desire and the determination to succeed.

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  • Author's Note
  • Prologue
  • 1. Bitten Bones
  • 2. Building Sand Castles
  • 3. And Then There Were Three
  • 4. Breaking Pact
  • 5. Failure to Thrive
  • 6. Houses of Sand
  • 7. Keeping Pact
  • 8. Empty Emancipation
  • 9. Out of Idaho
  • 10. Aging Out
  • 11. The Happy House
  • 12. A Child at Any Age
  • 13. Beacons of Light
  • Epilogue
  • Acknowlegments
Review by Publisher's Weekly Review

This true story of a woman surviving domestic abuse as a child, emancipating herself as a teenager, and then becoming a successful attorney is courageous and fascinating, written with a descriptive restraint that recalls moments of tragedy and perseverance with simplicity and subtlety. Her story begins with an account of life among "a scrappy pack of homeless siblings" and narrows to Calcaterra's rise to executive director of the New York State Moreland Commission on Utility Preparation and Response. Woven into the narrative is Calcaterra's search to discover the identity of her birth father, a man who resisted acknowledging that he is her parent; this conflict led to a landmark court decision in the state of Washington over an adult child's right to an accurate determination of paternity; it also led to a touching reunion with other members of her birth father's family. Written as a "story of the hope it took a community to raise a child," Calcaterra concludes her story with the genuine sentiment that "we all have to believe." At the end of this unforgettable book, readers will. (Aug.) (c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved.

(c) Copyright PWxyz, LLC. All rights reserved
Review by Kirkus Book Review

A prominent New York attorney's unsparing account of how she and her four siblings survived extreme abuse and neglect at the hands of their mentally ill mother. Cookie was a woman who "left behind scorched earth" wherever she went. Unstable, promiscuous and violently abusive, she had five children by five different men. Chaos and instability reigned throughout Calcaterra's childhood. Early on, Cookie left the children with relatives or took them to live with new boyfriends. But as her alcoholism and mental illness worsened, she left them in homeless shelters, trailers, parking lots, run-down apartments or houses and then vanished, often for weeks or months at a time. When Calcaterra was 8, she and her siblings made a pact to stay together, no matter what; it was better than being separated and losing all control over their lives in the impersonal, sometimes-frightening world of foster care. To survive, they stole food and clothes. They lied about their mother's whereabouts, as well as the burns, bruises and scratches that appeared on their bodies when she was home. Calcaterra emancipated herself at age 14 and reluctantly went to live with foster parents she did not want; they nonetheless helped her succeed. Seeking a way to empower herself so that she could "impact the lives of others," she attended college and law school, then pursued a career as a New York state public official. Despite her many professional triumphs, she hasn't overcome her guilt about the fate of her siblings. Calcaterra narrates her story in the present tense, which adds a painful immediacy and urgency to an already gut-wrenching account. Yet never once does she flinch from the terrible truths with which she has lived and so courageously reveals here. Riveting reading from start to finish.]] Copyright Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.

Copyright (c) Kirkus Reviews, used with permission.