Getting grief right Finding your story of love in the sorrow of loss

Patrick O'Malley

Book - 2017

"When the New York Times ran Patrick OMalley's story about the loss of his infant son—and how his inability to "move on" challenged everything he was taught as a psychotherapist—it inspired an unprecedented flood of gratitude from readers. What he shared was a truth that many have felt but rarely acknowledged by the professionals they turn to: that our grief is not a mental illness to be cured, but part of the abiding connection with the one we've lost" --Amazon....com.

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Subjects
Published
Boulder, Colorado : Sounds True 2017.
Language
English
Physical Description
xiii, 237 pages ; 21 cm
Bibliography
Includes bibliographical references.
ISBN
9781622038190
1622038193
Main Author
Patrick O'Malley (author)
Other Authors
Tim Madigan (author)
  • Introduction: what's wrong with me?
  • A therapist grieves
  • The cage of the stages
  • The way forward through stories
  • On the right path
  • No person's grief the same
  • Know thyself
  • How death comes
  • Attachment and grief
  • Your story
  • The culture of positivity
  • The expectations of others
  • Help for the helper
  • Sorrows shared
  • The therapist grieves still
  • Epilogue
  • Notes
  • Further reading
  • Appendix I: Seeking help
  • Appendix II: The vocabulary of grief
  • Getting grief right study guide : for individuals and groups
  • Acknowledgments
  • About the authors.
Review by Publisher Summary 1

A book about how to deal with the death of a loved one questions the familiar stages of grief and recovery and instead argues for a more authentic path that fully embraces sorrow, love, and connection.

Review by Publisher Summary 2

Losing someone we love may be the most challenging experience we will ever face. And knowing that our grief has not gone away over time only adds to our suffering. In this deeply supportive and insightful book, psychotherapist Patrick O’Malley shares how the death of his own infant son and his years of struggle to find "closure" led him to question the familiar "stages of grief" and recovery—and to find a more authentic path that fully embraces the sorrow, love, and connection with the ones we’ve lost.

Review by Publisher Summary 3

When the New York Times ran Patrick O’Malley’s story about the loss of his infant son—and how his inability to "move on" challenged everything he was taught as a psychotherapist—it inspired an unprecedented flood of gratitude from readers. What he shared was a truth that many have felt but rarely acknowledged by the professionals they turn to: that our grief is not a mental illness to be cured, but part of the abiding connection with the one we’ve lost. Illuminated by O’Malley’s own story and those of many clients that he’s supported, readers learn how the familiar "stages of grief" too often mislabel our sorrow as a disorder, press us to "get over it," and amplify our suffering with shame and guilt when we do not achieve "closure" in due course. "Sadness, regret, confusion, yearning—all the experiences of grief—are a part of the narrative of love," reflects O’Malley. Here, with uncommon sensitivity and support, he invites us to explore grief not as a process of recovery, but as the ongoing narrative of our relationship with the one we’ve lost—to be fully felt, told, and woven into our lives. For those in bereavement and anyone supporting those who are, Getting Grief Right offers an uncommonly empathetic guide to opening to our sorrow as the full expression of our love.

Review by Publisher Summary 4

When the New York Times ran Patrick O’Malley’s story about the loss of his infant son—and how his inability to "move on" challenged everything he was taught as a psychotherapist—it inspired an unprecedented flood of gratitude from readers. What he shared was a truth that many have felt but rarely acknowledged by the professionals they turn to: that our grief is not a mental illness to be cured, but part of the abiding connection with the one we’ve lost. Illuminated by O’Malley’s own story and those of many clients that he’s supported, readers learn how the familiar "stages of grief" too often mislabel our sorrow as a disorder, press us to "get over it," and amplify our suffering with shame and guilt when we do not achieve "closure" in due course. "Sadness, regret, confusion, yearning—all the experiences of grief—are a part of the narrative of love," reflects O’Malley. Here, with uncommon sensitivity and support, he invites us to explore grief not as a process of recovery, but as the ongoing narrative of our relationship with the one we’ve lost—to be fully felt, told, and woven into our lives. For those in bereavement and anyone supporting those who are, Getting Grief Right offers an uncommonly empathetic guide to opening to our sorrow as the full expression of our love.